The Last Thing To Let Go
Tonight we would have been at the concert. Our show, the band that had been significant in our relationship. Our first movie out together. The impetus for our trip, the first one I ever took in a relationship. Instead, I walked to the venue, met a couple people, and gave them the tickets. Our tickets, that we’d walked to the very same place to get months earlier. They were thrilled to have them, and they should be, they were great seats. I was glad they could use them, but it was bittersweet to hand them over as I thought about what could have been.
I’m over what happened, this isn’t an I Miss You sort of thing. This is the final good bye for me, I suppose. You said yours a long time ago, I’m sure, but things stuck around for me. I had to hold on to those tickets, walk past the places we went, see you in the things around me. My world was a mess for a while, and I’m still picking up some of the smaller things that were knocked lose. The big things are back in their place, but there’s still dust. In some way, for some things, that’ll always be there, I’m sure. I can’t clean up every nook.
It’s hard to say good bye sometimes. This has been one of those times. I’ve had a lot of moments in the past two months where I’ve said little good byes. I think tonight might have been the final one I needed to say.